Web of Loneliness Poems

Poems of the Lonely

Tag Archives: regret

Untitled by Ary

Failure is not fatal.
Hell if I knew;
It’s like cutting open a tortilla pack,
slipping with the knife on the final hurdle,
and then learning that the tortillas were mouldy…
and then your new lover learning that you eat plain tortillas on their own.
Yeah.
It’s another level of disappointment.
Sure, it’s not fatal, but, oh God, the pain.
The pain.
It’s brutal, malevolent and leaves a red-alert, not-so-paper trail.
Withdrawing from the whole thing takes a lot, because in my situation, you would’ve just started a healthy diet,
leaving that gaping abyss some place between your lungs, like a sink-hole,
you don’t even know where you’re putting it.
You would’ve texted the girl you like, saying something embarrassing.
You would’ve left your last lifeline behind, like a bad episode of ‘Who Wants to be a Millionaire?’,
and now you’re left with nothing, stubbornly exclaiming how you’ve won, you’ve beat the system,
you had damn good reason and feeling truly alone.
You’ll hate your life,
have a damn painful finger,
and scared you’re gonna live your whole life alone, full of regret.
I hate this feeling. It’s like being cheated on by God himself.
You haven’t a single friend in the world and you’re pretending that it’s all fine,
but the abyss doesn’t even want to make eye contact anymore:
he’s picked up his fucking phone.

One day, you have to decide to just fuck it.
I only know how to reverse in stick-shift, so I guess I’m going forward.
I’m not afraid… maybe a little. I’m about to hit a junction. Big one, too.
Biting point, anxiety, blah blah. Just push the pedal, slam down the accelerator,
because, as a wise man once said, ‘gotta go fast’.
Another one also said:
“Failure is not fatal, but failure to change might be.”

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Memories

Memories flow like butterflies. They pass by quietly, take me by surprise. Our wedding day, the trip together, our first love nest. Watching you leave me in the cold morning with a kiss. What a pleasure, did you know I used to watch you through my window until you disappeared? I think you knew because you would wave at the air. I would wait for your return smelling like roses and with a home cook meal.  I was pregnant! a surprise our first son what a joy!. He was perfect and full of energy. I loved you so much, but I didn’t know what love was until we parted. you with another wife and me with another man. What happened to us?.  What kind of pain was that.

I never been the same, never will. This loneliness is killing me. You will always be, my first love my only love. Years passed and it still hurts to think about our life together and how happy and perfect it was. I pray for you every night and for me. I need to find peace in this life without you or your love. To make peace with loneliness.

I look at my reflection in the mirror of time and I’m slowly dying with sadness and regrets. Nobody loves me, nobody wants me, I’m a shadow, a ghost, I go unnoticed and ignored. The world goes on without me like I never existed, why is loneliness so cruel.

I will love you forever and after death. I will give half my life for your embrace. My body craves your arms around me, to hug me, comfort me and dry my tears. I need your embraced now and forever.