Web of Loneliness Poems

Poems of the Lonely

Tag Archives: lost

Lost

And I’ve lost my footing once again
While moon drops reflect upon the sea
To cushion the love I have for you
To cushion the loss of inevitability
The driving concern to fill the need
The void deepens as I reach, reach.
For our last breath
And you hold out no arms
To brace me
From impact
So slammed
I am
Deep within the rocks
Stone shelter me
Caress the inner workings of my slight
Twist of hand
To breathe the air you breathe
To hear the words you speak
I am but the echoes of the love
You are to me
Up on a pedestal doused in esteem
It is the joy I once bathed you in
It is the love you do not feel for me

-MHK 2001-

 

Limbo

It feels like I’ve lost in a game

that I didn’t even have a turn.

My heart still bleeds

and eyes still burn.

I just didn’t know

that our feelings would never coincide.

I guess that’s my fault,

I kept mine hidden too deeply inside.

It seems after so many downfalls

all that’s left is rain.

Just a feeling of never ending pain.

How can you put yourself out there

to just be given back?

Matters of the heart just never seem

to be on the right track.

You spend your entire life making people happy

just to never be satisfied.

I miss the feeling of innocence,

not knowing the meaning of pain.

When there were no ulterior motives,

no heartaches to gain.

A friend is a friend

and one till the end.

Till something comes by

and the stakes are claimed.

Feelings of betrayal

but no one to take the blame.

They’ve covered their tracks,

they paved them with shame.

You build your life with dreams

to have them ripped away.

Taken by the bitter hearted

not knowing what they’ve started.

Well this is my story,

it’s sad but it’s true.

You can’t trust that person

unless that person is you.

 

C.M.L.

Unheard Last Words

As I stair at the ceiling when sitting at home

Wishing I had someone to talk to but I’m alone.

Nobody can hear me when I bawl

And nobody hears my distant call.

 

I don’t understand what as happened to me,

Why do I feel so lost and empty?

I am a tool, a machine, I have no soul.

There’s something missing inside I don’t feel whole.

 

Will I be lonely for the rest of my life?

Will I ever have kids a house and a wife?

Shall I do the deed and pick up that knife?

Press against myself with a subtle slice?

Or reflect on my health and maybe think twice?

Will there be someone to stop me and give advice?

 

These questions I ask but nobody can hear,

As the world would remain if I disappear.

I wallow in self pity and cry my heart out,

Knowing I am not loved without any doubt.

 

I have heard there is nothing more pathetic than a cry for help

You either do or you don’t want to kill yourself

This makes me pathetic as well as a weirdo,

I guess it is time for me to go

 

I’ve disappointed my father and that’s what hurts most.

So it is now time to turn to a ghost.

However souls are ghost so I wont be one,

The only thing I will be is gone.

 

by E

I Wish That I Could Hate You

It now has been so far away
Yet it seems like only yesterday

You turned and walked away
Like I was nothing

There never was a place for me
In your world of make-believe

A little bit of something
Would have been better than your nothing

And while yes, it is so true
My heart still aches for you
I wish, that I could hate you

This little girl, just a dreamer
A lost and lonely gypsy,
Now so afraid you were just another schemer
Do you really even miss me?

My soul, I bore open to trust in you
Yes, my heart still aches for you
I wish that I could hate you

And right or wrong, I carry on
As I still want for you
Even as in your world
Is where I no longer belong

My heart still aches
To see your smile
To feel your touch
To stay awhile

And pretend again for a moment
That you really did care
Cause baby, I miss you that much

I wish that I could hate you, but I don’t
I could have loved you, but you would not let me
So I won’t

And now it is that I have found
As my heart still aches for you
I can never really, truly, hate you

 

I Fell and Shadows Appeared

I fell and shadows appeared.

Ghosts that no longer talk to me.

Tried to love, tried to connect,

But the cut is cruel,

And unexpected.

When you lose what’s in your soul you question everything.

Lost my joy but not the memories, which now haunt my dreams.

Lost what I was most sure of.

Lost what I loved.

Now in prison, love only a memory.

On the other side of love I found despair.

Nothing good now, no pleasure other than fleeting.

Feelings always fall back low and heavy.

Will I rise, will I escape?

Want to escape, want to fly, but the shadows are always there,

recalling the sweet innocence of love, wreaking havoc where I stand.

Don’t want to be seen, stay in the dark

Can’t separate from the past, don’t know how to recover.

Nowhere to hide and exposed to shame

Face it head on, soak it up.

Divorced and divorced from emotion.

No more sharing now.

Don’t know the final lines, don’t have the answers.