Web of Loneliness Poems

Poems of the Lonely

Tag Archives: happiness

What Happened?

Always out there, always popular
Always had friends, always with a partner.
One marriage but what was love?
Another marriage and I had it for real
Then she went and found it with another.

My soul mate next but I couldn’t escape
The ravages of my childhood…Nor she
as we loved and lost and fell apart
time and time again.
For she was the one.
Now she’s gone too, and happy like all the rest.
After me they always do best.

Meeting new people, going out now.
Singles scene, not for me, but what else?
The process helps but can’t fill the hole within.
They care but I feel nothing.
What should I feel?
How do you feel?
Who to talk to?
Brother, Mother. They stuffed my head.
Father wonderful, but now he’s dead.

Now it’s just me and my new shadows.
Lurking, silent, unrelenting, cold and draining.
They follow me everywhere, They’re always there
I can no longer hide. When will they go?
But I have my kids, although they’ll never know.
So far so good, they haven’t seen through my faces
My smile manufactured when I take them places.

I’ve done my dash, I had my chances
Just never meant to be, for me.
I see now that the kind of happiness I’ve always dream of
was only meant for others.
And so many others
What happened to me?

Goodbye D
Goodbye J
Goodbye K
I envy your happiness.

 

Maybe Tonight

Maybe tonight is the night

When my pain will cease for good.

Maybe tonight is the night,

When I will end it; maybe I should.

Maybe tonight someone will notice

The chains that I am bound by.

Maybe tonight all this pain,

Maybe tonight, maybe it’ll all die.

Maybe tonight I will find happiness,

In a place far from here.

Maybe tonight, finally,

It’ll all become clear

Maybe tonight I’ll pick up my blade,

And put it to my throat.

Maybe tonight this will mean something,

This poem I wrote.

Lonely Heart and Lonely Nights

As darkness looms I gaze into the candle light ….

My heart feels the pains of wanting you with me each night

.

You came in to my life and brought a calm in my heart….

But now it just seems we are always so far apart

.

The brightness, love and happiness   you brought to my life….

Has been a source of releasing so much of my strife

.

I miss the times you reached for me then pulled me ever so near……

I miss the times you used to say “I love you “so softly in my ear

.

Thinking back on how long it has been….

I daily long for the time when you kiss me once again

.

My body aches to feel your arms holding me tight….

And just knowing you are there all through the night

.

Realizing we both have our own life struggles and pain…

Through these days we must not let our feelings wane

.

Even though we talk each night and each day….

My soul still aches with our being far away

.

I not only need you… but want you with all of my heart….

And pray to God for a day when we are no longer so far apart

.

I am here for the long haul to see this thing out ……….

And in hopes that you are having no doubt

.

Just know that I have grown to love you and always will….

For there is a place in my heart that only you can fill

.

By: Cheryl Stephens

Hollow

By Raven

It is a Hollow I cannot fill,

I pine for it,

But I do not belong, anywhere.

I watch groups of friends interact,

Smile, laugh, kiss, dance,

It hurts so badly as I realise want to be a part of it so much,

I want to laugh without a care in the world,

I want to have days where we get together and just talk about the things we love.

I want days where we just mess about and do nothing,

I want to be able to give and receive hugs and kisses,

I want to be capable of love, of trust,

But I understand that, it is not to be.

I am always looking in from outside,

Standing on the edge smiling pathetically to myself,

Living vicariously through those that I watch,

Spending evenings imagining myself as a part of those groups,

Tears coursing down my cheeks as I smile dreaming of the things I can never have,

Taking a sadistic pleasure in gathering as many memories of those forbidden pleasures,

Of comfort, of happiness and love,

I cannot stop watching for fear of drowning in the depression of a realisation where I truly understand that I am denied the very things I spend my days viewing.

Alone I stand outside that dirty window peering in.

Even if I could gather up the courage to knock on the glass and ask to be let in, I would fall short.

Because in my world, although there is a window, there is certainly not….

A door.

 

Behind Closed Doors

In a glass house I sit, a lady,
hidden behind closed doors, trying not to judge those around me.

I feel their happiness and wonder, their joy and bliss,
and recall the feel of love’s kiss.

But my house is worn and old.
Experience seeps in, leaving me cold.

I wrap a blanket of emotions around me,
to ward off the chill and pain of feeling lonely.

My normally calm exterior can no longer withstand the storm of feelings,
and rain down on me through the cracks in the ceiling.

I escape and seek the shelter and warmth of a neighboring fire,
but there are riots of emotions that disturb me there and the passions run higher.

I hear Nature and, while searching, I find an unknown way,
full of birds chirping with all of the excitement of a new day.

However, powerless; I stumble.
I smash against the rocks and float like flotsam amongst the waterfall’s rumble.

Currents of emotion overwhelm me and I flounder, looking for something to hold onto.
Unexpectedly, I turn around and find you.

With the touch of your hands, I slowly begin to smile.
I realize it’s been a while.

I breathe heavily – then hot.
I’m no longer drowning – I’m not.

 

Copyright:  Tracey L. Mummert, May 16, 2006